Frightening Life Events
By Dick Farenhorst

("An anxious heart weighs down a person" - Proverbs 12:25)

After killings in Britain some time ago, parents were looking to have chips implanted in their children to be able to follow and track them at all times. Mary Piper ("Reviving Ophelia") writes that in today's world it's almost impossible to not be an overanxious parent.

When public events happen or ones that directly impact us, we all try to cope in our individual ways and we all have strong feelings about the events, a primary one being anxiety. The percentage of people who develop a turbulent and persistent response to a dangerous event is about 15% (Bowlby). At the same time many people show a tremendous resilience to withstand hugely difficult events such as war trauma, rape, earthquake disasters. Differentiating factors which are influential include family, friends, and community support. War torn countries or earthquake devastated communities often simultaneously will experience people helping other people, people supporting one another and consoling one another. God has created us as social human beings who need each other and if we isolate ourselves we place our emotional and physical well-being at peril. We need each other and we need to help each other. Another factor that differentiates folks that do well is our general emotional temperament – likely genetically influenced, but also impacted by early family experiences. Experiences of childhood loss or separation are prominent in the development of fearful feelings and behaviours later on (Bowlby).

Some people respond to frightening events by talking to friends, family, church members. Others prefer to not talk at all but to reflect. Some try to not think about the event or try to distract themselves; usually trying ways of coping that have worked for them in the past. There really is no one way that is normative in coping and we do well not to judge others who cope differently than we do. However, sometimes the emotional turmoil is so great that it interferes with normal activities and isn't resolved within a few weeks. Post traumatic stress disorder is one example of a disorder which arises from some severe traumatic event and persists for weeks. Fortunately, there are now some wonderfully effective short-term trauma therapies that can bring much relief in a short time span.

No matter what our anxiety level or trauma, we can be reassured by affirming our ultimate grounding in Jesus comforting words, "My peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you" (John 14:27).